No, not me.
A number of our dear friends have come to us today, seeking help and advice for various relationship issues.
I am flattered, because apparently everyone thinks we have a perfect relationship.
It's really easy to see that in other people, especially when your engaged and its hard as heck. (All of them are engaged, hence the temporary blindness to any problems but their own). I remember feeling that way when I was engaged, and I still look at people around me (my parents, my bishop, ect.) and think, "why aren't we more like them?"
But then I remember how far we've come.
I had a major crisis before the wedding (who doesn't) where I was sure I was making the wrong decision for me. I just felt sick whenever Tyler texted/called me because I was so afraid to tell him. Mom and I were flying up to visit, and as we were getting on the plane, I was literally thinking "I'll just see how it goes, then give him the ring back, then come home." But when I got there, I saw him and got to be with him, that was when I remember how much I wanted to spend eternity with him. I came home to Albuquerque for our last stretch apart before the big day and waited for the feeling to fade. I prayed about it some more and kept feeling so happy and so excited. During that time I really received my confirmation about marrying Tyler. It was a huge turning point in my whole attitude about marrying him.
Marriage is hard. It's scary. The months leading up to it were some of the hardest in my [short] life. But it was so worth it. I'm glad I went through a time where I questioned everything, because I really had to make up my mind and choose what was right for me. Now I get to stick by my choices, knowing that I made them for all the right reasons and with divine guidance.
Anyway, the point is, a relationship crisis is important because it's where you choose either to push through and earn it, or realize that it just isn't right for you. For me, it defined the relationship as it is today. I expect there may be a few more of these moments in the future, and I hope I handle them well.
So there's all the deep thoughts swimming around in my head. Now I can go to bed and actually sleep.
-Mrs. Smith
3 comments:
I had that same experience. I still wonder if I made the right choice, 10 years later. Weird, right? I mean, not that I'm unhappy in my marriage or anything, but I had SO many doubts during our engagement, it just makes me think.
Thats good to hear... because I felt terrible about having doubts in the weeks following the wedding. It's just like... I made this choice, and I have to live with it FOREVER and ever and ever.
so what i think is so amazing about this post is your realization of this at such a young age. cheers to you! seriously. making a life long decision at any age is hard, but i honestly being so young i truly can't imagine and congratulate you on that!
i don't have doubts as much as i have insecurities. and i think that's because i'm older. and have the dating experience that i have. i'm slowly realizing that what Chris says is what he means. and this is a huge learning curve for me. and i'm insecure in the way i question if Chris is making the right choice. i know that sounds horrible, but it has to do with the insecurities i have in myself. who knows if this makes any sense. but in the end i come back to my gut in knowing that he and i are meant to be and that our love is strong. one thing i know for sure is i could list so many more things as why we should be together compared to why we shouldn't.
Post a Comment